Wanted, Warlands, We Stand on Guard, Wetworks

Wanted 1-6

This is Mark Millar trying too hard to get a rise out of the reader, giving them shit for being ‘ordinary.’  The message means less when it’s being delivered by a young white guy who’s born into special abilities and privilege that he didn’t earn.  It would be different if Millar was trying to be ironic, but there’s no trace of self-awareness, only self-importance.

Watching this punk abuse his gifts for six issues is annoying, not entertaining, and he’s not nearly as bad ass as he thinks, which means he doesn’t even fall into the ‘badass villain’ category.  The more I think about it, the more it all ticks me off. So the question is: Why am I not happily chucking this thing into the cut box?

It’s not the art.  JG Jones is good, but it’s not enough to carry the series on it’s own.  Is it the prestige? It’s got Millar’s name on the cover and was made into a movie, albeit an okay but not rewatchable one.  (Though as ridiculous as the concept is, “curving the bullet” is comic book crazy enough to be awesome.)  Is it the fact that it’s a nice trade, and not six floppy issues?  

No, it’s none of those.  Maybe I wish it was better, and hope that it’ll improve the next time I read it.  Which I’m really not inclined to do right now. Eh. When in doubt, keep it around.  Why couldn’t Millar have finished War Heroes instead of spending his time on this?

Regret buying: No

Would buy again: No

Would read again: No

Rating: Disliked

Warlands 1

I loved Pat Lee’s art when he was at Dreamwave.  His anime style was so different from anything else that I was reading.  Now, it’s still pretty good. But it’s wasted on a derivative fantasy story.  Easy cut. If I want to look at art like this, I can watch any number of good animes.

Regret buying: No

Would buy again: No

Would read again: No

Rating: Boring

We Stand on Guard 1

The United States and Canada go to war over...something.  Water, I think. The US has massive warmechs. The Canadians have a tiny resistance militia.  It’s...fine. It’s nice to see Steve Skroce after he rocketed to fame with his Matrix storyboarding (I liked him on X-Man before that).  

Skroce had a major hand in one of the most famous scenes in film history.

I’ll keep it around because the concept is hilarious, even though the execution is meh.  (Hey, I just realized it’s written by Brian K Vaughan. Some things never change.)

Regret buying: No

Would buy again: No

Would read again: Yes

Rating: Fine

Wetworks 1-7,9,11

Early Image comics are why people like Warren Ellis and Alan Moore are brought in to do reboots - The concepts have great promise, the art is fantastic, but the writing renders them practically unreadable.  Someone should revisit Wetworks, the basic idea remains strong.  I like how the golden symbiotes accentuate the strength of the hosts, and Portacio depicts them in appealing ways.

Love snipers in fiction.

Love the blue glow.

Two different vampire appearances in the same day.  (They were in Warlands, too.)  Neither interesting in the slightest.  Come to think of it, how many good vampire comics are there?  Hmm. Buffy, but that wasn’t initially a comic. I don’t remember anything about American Vampire.  

I’m keeping this for sentimental purposes.  (I grew up with early Image.) But it’s not that good.

Regret buying: No

Would buy again: No

Would read again: No

Rating: Didn’t suck