Uncanny X-Force

Uncanny X-Force 25-35

I tried, but I was completely unengaged for the final, interminable arc of Uncanny X-Force.  It revolves around the latest iteration of the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants’ attempt to turn Kid Apocalypse to the dark side of the Force.  Lots of fighting and empty angst provide eleven issues’ worth of filler material. Let’s take a closer look.

Jerome Opena does most of the covers, and continues to be the best part of this title.

The Fantomex/Psylocke relationship has zero chemistry.  (Neither did the Archangel/Psylocke pairing, but that was in another arc; And besides, Warren is dead.)  Fantomex seems to be in it for the sex and Betsy is on the “desperate to feel anything because she is magically (literally) incapable of feeling sorrow” track.  Yet Remender persists in wasting pages on this directionless couple. Either write a better relationship for Psylocke or focus on the sweet ninja action that she does best.  

So after writing that last paragraph, I decided to go through each issue to see what what Remender was trying to accomplish each month.  I came up with this:

• 25
• Betsy quits.
• Fantomex quits.
• Brotherhood captures Deadpool, Wolverine, and Nightcrawler.
• Omega Clan shows up.  
• 26
• Brotherhood captures Psylocke.
• Deadpool, Wolverine, and Nightcrawler escape.
• 27
• Brotherhood captures Kid Apoc
• Fantomex rescues Psylocke
• Brotherhood kills Fantomex
• EVA takes humanoid form.    
• 28
• X-Force teleports to a dystopian future to avoid death.
• Psylocke tries to kill herself to prevent that future from happening.
• 29
• Future X-Force keeps Psylocke alive, sends the team back to the present.  
• 30
• Brotherhood does mean things to Kid Apoc to make him a killer.
• 31
• Brotherhood does mean things to Kid Apoc to make him a killer.
• 32
• Brotherhood captures Deadpool trying to rescue Kid Apoc.
• Brotherhood does mean things to Kid Apoc to make him a killer.
• Nightcrawler betrays X-Force so that he can kill AoA Blob.  (Not sure how the two are related.)
• Brotherhood captures Wolverine.
• 33
• Nightcrawler kills AoA Blob
• Brotherhood does mean things to Kid Apoc to make him a killer.
• 34
• Brotherhood does mean things to Kid Apoc to make him a killer.
• Wolverine kills Daken
• Deadpool kills Skinless Man
• Nightcrawler escapes with Mystique.
• Kid Apoc doesn’t become a killer.
• 35
• Fantomex is resurrected into 3 bodies, one for each brain.  

To sum up, there are a bunch of captures and escapes, a pointless two-issue detour to the future, five issues of Kid Apocalypse temptation (which fails), and a lot of fighting.  Deadpool gets way too much of a soul (this attempt at character growth is a complete fail) and Daken whines about his daddy issues for far too long.

As much as I love Phil Noto’s art in other places, it’s too jarring of a contrast to the style set by Opena, et al.  It doesn’t work here.

Too cartoony for what's needed.

I got nothing out of any of this.  No emotional satisfaction from the characters, the action, the plot anything.  I’m cutting everything after the Dark Angel Saga, and I’m not going to miss it for a second.

Regret buying: No

Would buy again: No

Would read again: No

Rating: Stupid (Cutting)